Finding the Rhythm

A funny thing happens when there's a holiday and work somehow continues anyway.

Nobody removes a day's worth of work.

They just give you four days to do five days of it.

It's Wednesday.

Technically, this is only the second day of the work week.

Somehow...

I feel like I've been playing catch-up for a month.

There are a lot of wheels spinning right now.

Some of them are even finding traction.

The list of things that need to happen seems to be growing faster than we're crossing things off.

Meetings.

Projects.

Follow-ups.

Things that need scheduling.

Things that needed scheduling yesterday.

The normal chaos of work compressed into four days.

Then there's school.

All six of us are officially in it now.

The kids are settling into their rhythms.

I'm settling into mine.

And I'm already applying a lesson I learned a few classes ago.

Wait.

I finally got my grades and professor feedback from the first week.

Good grades.

Solid notes.

And now I feel much more confident about what I'll submit this week.

I can still write ahead.

I can still have most of my work ready Tuesday.

But sometimes it's worth waiting for the feedback before pushing the button.

Except discussion posts.

Those are going up Tuesday.

I'm not a monster.

Yesterday brought a different kind of education.

We discovered that school pictures are today.

Haircuts were...

Needed.

So after school, I grabbed David and Jacob and added myself to the list.

Three haircuts.

Done.

Everybody reasonably presentable for photographic evidence of this school year.

Success.

Then we discovered the homework.

Jacob stayed up about an hour and a half later than normal getting caught up.

David finished his too.

Screen time became even more limited than usual.

By the time everyone finally settled down, it had been a long day.

Apparently my brain wasn't finished.

For reasons I cannot explain, I left my glasses in the bathroom.

I never leave my glasses in the bathroom.

My sleeping brain apparently knew this.

So I spent what felt like most of the night dreaming that I was looking for my glasses.

They were in the bathroom.

Exactly where I left them.

Fantastic use of several hours of subconscious processing.

This morning...

We were rough.

Everyone was tired.

Feet dragging.

Attitudes slightly sharper than they needed to be.

Jacob was definitely feeling the late night.

But we got everyone where they needed to go.

I'm writing this on cup number three of coffee.

It's about 10:00 in the morning.

I feel like I've already worked a full day.

Happy Wednesday.

This keeps bringing me back to something I've noticed about the different hats I wear.

At work, I spend an enormous amount of energy creating order.

Where are we?

What are we doing?

Where are we going?

What's due?

Who's responsible?

What's next?

Checklists.

Schedules.

Backlogs.

Plans.

Structure.

That's part of leadership.

Then I come home.

And four children remind me that order is mostly theoretical.

There's something almost refreshing about that.

Almost.

The trick is remembering which hat I'm wearing.

I can't run my family like an analytics department.

And letting things simply unfold at work to "see what happens" probably isn't a sustainable leadership strategy either.

Sometimes the experiments work.

Sometimes they absolutely do not.

Home needs structure too.

Just a different kind.

We're starting to build some of that around school.

David's fall baseball should be getting sorted out in the next few days.

Jacob is already asking about basketball.

We're slowing that one down.

This is his first year transitioning from homeschool into a classroom.

One new rhythm at a time.

Zoey, meanwhile, has completely adapted to hers.

So we're adding another experiment.

Money.

Her online school costs us $80 a month when she does what she's supposed to do.

If she doesn't, it becomes $180.

So I've made her a deal.

I'm budgeting $200 every month.

If she keeps doing what she's doing and the bill stays at $80...

The remaining $120 is hers.

Not to spend now.

We're putting it away.

Someday, that account helps buy her first car.

The boys have their own version.

Their opportunity to earn is tied to school performance and discipline.

And because we're trying to build this as a family system, what they earn will help establish the average for Zoey and Asher too.

The first round comes at Christmas.

Money they can use to buy gifts for each other.

The second comes before our family vacation next summer.

Money they can use for the things they want along the way.

Will the system work perfectly?

Probably not.

There are six of us involved.

Nothing works perfectly.

But that's not really the goal.

We're trying things.

Adjusting.

Teaching.

Learning.

Finding what works for each kid.

Finding what works for us.

Finding the rhythm.

Because that's really what September feels like.

Summer is disappearing.

School is becoming normal.

Sports are starting.

My classes are moving.

Work is moving approximately seventeen directions simultaneously.

Everyone is tired.

And the checkboxes keep multiplying.

We'll get through them.

Or we'll decide some of them didn't need checking in the first place.

For now...

Cup three.

Wednesday.

Keep moving.

Order and rhythm aren't the same thing. Order suggests everything is exactly where it belongs. Rhythm leaves room for something to happen a little early, a little late, or completely differently than we expected while still moving us forward. Work often needs order. Families need enough structure to keep everyone moving, but also enough flexibility to recognize that people aren't checkboxes. Right now, we're still figuring out the rhythm of this new season. Some days will be smoother than others. Today isn't particularly smooth. But everyone got where they needed to go, the work is moving, the kids are learning, and the coffee is still hot. For Wednesday, that'll do.

Much love.

Stay safe.

Wash your damn hands.

And I will see you, next time.